obmar
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Must it be Nasruddin again?Nasruddin Goes Fishing
One day, Mullah Nasruddin decided to go fishing. He called upon his good friend Rabbi Moishe, got their poles and bait together, rented a small rowboat at the local harbor, and off to sea they went.
After an amazing afternoon of fishing, the two men had caught thirty fish. An elated Mullah Nasruddin said to Rabbi Moishel, "Better mark this spot so we can come here tomorrow!"
The next day Mullah Nasruddin met up with Rabbi Moishe at the rental harbor for another day of fishing.
"Did you mark the spot?" Mullah Nasruddin asked Rabbi Moishe confidentially.
"Of couse," replied Rabbi Moishe, "I painted a big white X on the bottom of the rowboat."
"You fool!" Shouted Mullah Nasruddin and slapped his forehead, "What if we can't rent that same boat today?!?!?"
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The Beat
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Pretty good, obmarTwo hobos are riding on a train.
One turns to the other and asks, "What time is it?"
The other looks at the first hobo and says, "It's Wednesday."
"Thanks," says the first hobo. "This is where I get off."
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obmar
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DEDUCTIVE REASONING"HOW OLD ARE YOU, MULLA? SOMEONE ASKED, 'THREE YEARS OLDER THAN MY BROTHER.'HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT? 'REASONING. LAST YEAR. I HEARD MY BROTHER TELL SOMEONE THAT I WAS TWO YEARS OLDER THAN HIM. A YEAR HAS PASSED. THAT MEANS THAT I AM OLDER BY ONE YEAR. I SHALL SOON BE OLD ENOUGH TO BE HIS GRANDFATHER.'
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The Beat
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obmar
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MORE USEFULMORE USEFUL
ONE DAY MULLAH NASRUDDIN ENTERED HIS FAVORITE TEAHOUSE
AND SAID:'THE MOON IS MORE USEFUL THAN THE SUN'. AN OLD
MAN ASKED 'WHY MULLA?'
NASRUDDIN REPLIED 'WE NEED THE LIGHT MORE
DURING THE NIGHT THAN DURING THE DAY.'
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The Beat
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A Mexican joke:
The Lelo brothers are walking home late at night from a party as usual completely drunk. Suddenly, one of them stops undernearth a lightpole and starts scouring the ground.
"What are you looking for?" asks the other brother.
"I'm looking for my keys."
"Where do you think you lost them?"
"Two blocks back."
"Huh?" replies the brother confused. "Then why in tarnation are we looking for them here?"
"Silly," says the first brother, "there's more light here. You can't see anything back there."
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obmar
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Here's life's important questions. Just don't expect any answers!!
What is the speed of dark?
When you're sending someone Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's?
If women wear a pair of pants, a pair of glasses, and a pair of earrings, why don't they wear a pair of bras?
How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
What's another word for synonym?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
When sign-makers go on strike, what is written on their picket signs?
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
How can there be self-help groups?
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
Why is it that when you transport something by car, its called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
Where are Preparations A through G?
Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?
If knees were backwards, what would chairs look like?
When you open a new bag of Cotton Balls, are you supposed to throw the top one away?
When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?
What happened to the first 6 "ups"?
If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?
Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
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Blue1moon
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ROFLOL obmar - those were great!
I'm stealing the last one for alienlove!
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