
Radiate_Truth
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Dave's crystal ball(s)Dave's crystal ball(s)
Are there any non-believers present? I thought as much. Now, we will begin...Everyone hold cyber-hands. Eeny weenie chili beanie, the spirits are about to speak. (BRRRRRAAAPP) Thank you, spirits. (I sense one of us has consumed many chili beanies). The crystal is now in touch with the infinite....I see, wait....A reporter....She has a concerned look on her make-up caked face. What is she saying?....I hear of fire...a fire in the west. Many fires (like the one in my gut after chili beanie lunch--with Fritos).She is appearing suspicious; intoning flatly of terror...no terrorism. Yes, oh spirits, she is saying that the fires in the west are caused by terrorists!! Wait, oh spirits...ooops, we're having an energy shortage blackout. Now the crystal has reestablished contact with the infinite (Thank you PG&E spirits). Now, I hear the woman speaking of warming, oval...no, GLOBAL warming...yes, and she speaks of solutions---no pollutions-- ('Stupid Kmart crystal ball). Now, she says the drought is caused by global warming, and that terrorists have taken advantage of this...wait, the crystal has just ran out of warranty, and subsequently went dark. I will return after another trip to Kmart, oh true believers!!
David Baker
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